February 21, 2005
6:46 PM
i am not dead. even if all of these schoolwork are killing me, i am still breathing. i would never be suffocated by the pressure of success, for I am with Him. He leads my way, and truly, there is nothing to be afraid of. i may be lost, but surely, He'll put me back in the right track.
He loves me... and yes Lord, I LOVE YOU TOO. :D
be back with a long entry after all these! ciao! :D
February 11, 2005
7:52 PM
I WANT TO...
* be an expert in programming... and in making websites... TEACH ME :'c
* learn how to make super nice Flash Presentations
* learn on how to navigate Adobe Photoshop, as well
* SLEEP right now
* finish my ARP ASAP (but i know i can't )
* watch Meet the Fockers
* have a massage
* change the music here in my blog
* write a good entry, but i can't
* write an essay but my mind's not functioning
* write a poem (hmmm... i wanna write A LOT...)
* pray, esp for those in need (i think this is the only thing i can do as of the moment)
* finish reading all the already-dust-covered novels on my book rack
* go to Greenhills
* and buy clothes...
* bags...
* make-up...
* accessories..
* AND flip-flops/sandals/shoes!
* finish all my homeworks already (but i'm too lazy...)
* download songs and cd-write all of it
* take a warm bath
* eat Mcdo french fries
* with Mcflurry Oreo...
* and still not gain weight wahaha
* change my blog's template (AGAIN)
* surf the net all over the weekend
* go to Caliraya for some strange reason
* buy a new phone! (Vina, akin na cel mo!)
* have an XDA or P900 (Queen? hehe.)
* have a brand new modern age laptop (panahon pa ni kopong-kopong yung akin)
* eat banana split
* stop thinking of what i want NOW
* hear a good joke
* talk to someone. wala lang.
okay, ill stop na...
c'est la vie.
BY THE WAY... haha! here's for a good laugh!
How To Start Your Very Own Blog In Fifty-One Easy Steps! MUST-READ! :D
February 10, 2005
8:01 PM
how come i couldn't manage my time? argh! i made a schedule of all of the things i need to do tonight. NOW, it's already 8pm, and i haven't finished any single thing!! :'(
Yahoo! mail has problems as well (or is it my pc??)... It can't attach the files i need to send to my classmate tonight! waaah!
8:58 AM
by the way, please please pray for my cousins' family. God, i believe you're helping them out. THANK YOU.
8:03 AM
"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within." -James Baldwin
i have my masks. i can't easily open my truest self to everyone i know. i blend with them... i try to get along with them... i could be very cautious at times, for i am afraid i may be neglected, abandoned, and left.
however, it gives me such comfort knowing that somewhere in this world, i could freely take off my masks, show off my beauty and flaws and, still, be accepted and loved. it gives me such delight knowing that somewhere in this world, i could just talk and talk without even thinking what i'm saying and yet, evey word i say... every pouring of blood out of my heart... would still be collected, cleansed and rejoiced upon.
i am just so glad, that for almost 4 years now, i have that security of having that somewhere in this world, where i could just throw away my masks and be seen bluntly for who i am...
Somewhere in this world, I am ME... And I'll forever cherish the thought that somewhere in this world would always be in his heart.
advance happy valentine's baby...
Thank GOD I have you.
February 07, 2005
2:17 PM
Convictions
I long to wake to the brightest of sunshines
and to live in the finest moments of my life.
I dream to touch the tallest peaks
and to reach the highest skies beyond the clouds.
I will make sense of all that is right.
I will face whatever comes
with a strong and willful heart.
I will love as if nothing else matters,
as if my very being exists solely
for the beating of my heart.
the first time i read this poem, i knew exactly that it reflects my heart.
great job sheryl!!
here are some thought-provoking quotes that i found in sheryl's blog as well.
"Love is a commitment of the heart that will stand the test of wavering emotions, intellectual rationalizing, circumstantial allure, hormonal infatuation, and even the wounds of your lover. Anything less is not true love."
"Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are." -- Warrior of the Light, a www.paulocoelho.com.br publication.
thank you Lord for such insights. ü
8:49 AM
baby was in a badminton game yesterday. he asked me to open my mail to see this picture, so that i may think he won. but no i didn't! hehehe. joke lang baby. i know you're more than all the trophies in the world. yihaa, kilig na 'yan! 
8:25 AM
no classes today. hurrah! am in a hurry because i still have to take a bath and rush to tita ni's house to send an e-mail to my classmate who has been waiting for it for sooo long already. (whoa!) sorry, carmela.
saw maxene's blog a while ago. she has been my classmate in math, but then she dropped it 'coz she's afraid it might affect her QPI since math11's really really hard. well she's one giddy girl, but after reading her blog... i realized she has one good heart as well. snaps for you, maxx!ü
February 06, 2005
1:17 PM
i have a new layout again! my previous skin had some problems, so i had to replace it since i don't have any idea how to fix it. sayang, i love that layout pa naman. anyweiz, this one is good as well!ü post on my tagboard everyone! (scroll down at the right menu) thanks!ü
♥ing life
1:04 PM
Pictures, pictures, pictures!ü 
enjoying free cut at jollibee! 
me, juice and doty! 
charles, me, doty and lloyd =D
February 04, 2005
7:12 PM
yey! im home already. school wasn't really that bad today, to think that it is a friday. i usually both love and hate fridays. i love it because the weekend's starting already, yet i hate it because it's the day where i stay longest in school. my classes are from 7:30-3:30... i have english, lit, math, chem lecture and my chem lab!
i already posted here a while ago that i was late in my english class. i was preparing for lit pa nga di'ba? surprisingly, while i was walking on my way to our classrom, one of my classmates told me that we have free cut in lit! happiness#1! wooohoo! thank God also at naabutan ko pa sina queen and juice (together with doty, charles, and lloyd) , who were all planning to eat out! of course i tagged along! happiness#2! hahaha. we decided to eat in jollibee, whose breakfast i actually like better than mcdo's. (i pointed this out to them!) when we were there already, queen, doty and i decided to eat beef tapa. happiness#3! i love jollibee's beef tapa... and of course, their hamburger steak! (okay, stop those thoughts now.) we also took pictures (which i will post here soon) the whole time, and planned to have the whole block to go to tagaytay (happiness#4!) before summer classes start (oh yes, we have summer classes). they also genuinely helped me with my math homework, as usual. that's what best about MIS people, actually. they're so good in math (lalo na si queen and eric!), as if they have calculators built in their brains!! oh well that's happiness#5!
during our break naman, tin and i were together. i love being with tin! actually we're supposed to be a group consisting of jo, mich, tin and i. i'm actually like the 4th wheel (if there's such a thing) because the three of them are english and lit blockmates! they get to hang out together, samantalang ako, i get to be with them separately. for example kanina, i was with tin. there are times that i'm with jo, whom i love as well (i share a locker with her), and there are times naman that i am with mich, whom i love as much. kaso mich and i very seldom spend time together because our scheds don't meet (bruha, meet tayo!=D). im not really close to my home blockmates, but im just so happy that i have these people. happiness#6!=D
carmela also told us (another home blockmate of ours) that we don't have nstp anymore for this sem, since the kids whom we're teaching (literary training service kasi kami) have to have make-up classes every saturday because all of their classes were suspended this week. another piece of joy! happiness#7! well NO, im not happy because i don't get to serve those kids anymore. it would be a long time before we get to see each other again... i'm really gonna miss them actually. they are so sweet! one of them even gave me a bracelet. pero what really makes me happy is the fact that my saturday mornings are free already!! it could be really tiring to the eyes to see ateneo 6x straight in a week, you know.
anyweiz, i forgot my lab apron during chem lab! buti nalang mang jun was there to lend me one. happiness#8! sir rene was also very nice. he lend me his book, How to Make Yourself Miserable (it's a funny book). i wanna tell him sana that his subject itself makes me miserable already!! hehe, kidding! i promised him that i'd lend him one novel as well (baka yung kay john grisham).
papa wasn't able to fetch me today. but it's a blessing in disguise actually. juice and i commuted the way home together. we had our One to One in... guess where? Go Nuts Donuts! haha, envious?? oh well!=D happiness#9! we talked about prayer and how important it is in our relationship with our Big Guy up there. God gave us his word in the Bible; we give our word back to him through prayer. if we pray for God's will in our lives, we are really sure to get an answer, which for sure is the best for us.
my trip home was kinda scary because there were these dirty big guys in the bus! thank God im home safe right now, and still perfectly fine to end this entry.
my hours didn't turn out to be dragging... yet my wait has been over. time to rest now! no classes on monday.=D ♥ing life =D
BTW, i got prizes (bookmarks!) in english because our group was the best in one activity, and then i got a B+ in my long test (was that a long test?). happiness#10!=D
7:59 AM
im late. waaah. this is, like, the 5th time i've been out for english. i woke up at 6 a while ago ('coz i arrived home at 11 last night because we still had to watch a play in school) and yet, i still slowly prepared for school. i was in the bathroom for, like, 15 minutes. basta i finished taking a bath, dressing up and brushing my teeth (after munching a piece of spam!) at 645. i went to my dad to tell him that i'm all okay already. pero wow... when i saw him, he was still in his sando and shorts!! GRRR. so there.. i waited for around 7mins again for him to be dressed... then off we went. syempre how can you expect someone to arrive in katipunan from paranaque in just around 30 mins?! kaya 'eto... im here again in foyer, and again, using the pc for the nth time.
i'm trying to find an analysis of the short story The Fog Horn by Ray Bradbury, because i'm not really sure of what's its theme and all. eh eto na yung discussion in lit mamaya. but heck, wala akong makita!
i want to go home already. i want to sleep. i want to eat. i want to sleep. i want to eat.
but still 7 hours to go. that's just a short time, isn't it? 7 "short", draaaagggiiing hours.
oh well "sometimes life could be really exasperating" (quoted from my chem prof by the way).
gotta hold on. still ♥ing life =D
February 02, 2005
7:00 PM
i feel like narrating the events of the day, so please let me.
*you have no choice anyway!*
i arrived at school early. i think i was already there at around7. lloyd was the only person in the room when i got in. so there... we chatted for a while. we talked about the film which we were required to watch by our prof in our lit class. it's entitled Three Seasons. we're not really a fan of art films that's why we both agreed that it was a bit hard to comprehend.
one by one, my classmates started arriving. they rushed to their seats and looked over their notes while waiting for our prof. only then did i realize that we were supposed to have a long quiz pala! buti nalang i-a-attack lang namin ung isang essay and point out what's true and fallacious about it.
so ayun. our prof arrived and handed over the essay.
the essay was so judgemental! the author (Art Bell) despises filipinos so much! guess what's the essay's title? filipinos... *make me puke*. shoot. i wanna pray for him BIG TIME. there was so much discrimination in his text. kesho daw third world tayo, wala tayong karapatan maki-connect sa china and japan. "nothing good has and could ever come out of Filipinos", he said. what the heck. WHO is HE anyway?
after my english class, which was already our lit class, i started doing my math homework. pa lang. my math class is after my lit class. procrastinator huh?!! kaya man, i really have to lessen my cramming skills. (this is my everyday's resolution but nothing really happens) well i know i couldn't possibly get rid of it totally. kaya nga lessen na lang eh. hehe.
we also had oral recitation in lit about the story The Bread of Salt. i was the one who first recited. our prof asked me to explain the theme of the story. well i knew my point already but it was completely a different thing trying to explain it straight in english. i stammered from time to time! haha.
afterwards, queen helped me with my math homework. i rushed to my math class as soon as the bell rung. i had some of the questions in my homework still unanswered. buti na lang jen was there. she let me copy some of her answers. i crammed na nga, i cheated pa. God sorry.='c
after math, juice (thanks juice!) tagged along with me sa bel because i needed to request for the transcript of my 1st sem grades, which is one of the requirements for me to be able to shift to another course. ayaw nga lang nila ibigay 2ndsem advisory grades ko.='c i lost the original copy of my 2ndsem advisory grades that's why i tried to ask for a new one again. but they didn't allow. so pagdasal ko nalang daw na 'di maligaw ng kartero yung extra copy ng grades ko addressed to my parents (sabi ni juice). well haha, that's my only hope. (at least i still have hope, di'ba.)
then the best part! we had cell! i was super hyper kanina! haha. the warm-up question was what talents are we proud of. grabe, guess what jo shared? EATING! she insisted that it is actually a talent to eat kasi raw bakit pa may mga eating contests di'ba? wahaha, whatta a point! jo could really make me laugh.=D (peace jo!=D)
then david had his sharing. these are what i learned:
- God gave us our talents for us to develop it. We develop it for the sole purpose of pleasing Him. Only Him.
- There's no point comparing ourselves to others because God gave us different talents with different measures. Whatever has been given to you, God expects much from it. That's why you need to focus on what you have to be able to produce something.
- When you focus on your talents, you do not only please God but you also earn self-fulfillment.
that is why after listening to david, i promised myself i WILL really polish my writing for the greater glory of god. i WILL also play my keyboard more often para 'pag magaling na magaling na 'ko, i could play every time there's worship at church. i WILL practice the gift of listening to make others realize that there is still someone who cares for them, because i believe i am a medium of a God (all of us should be).
so there. i had chem afterwards (oh no, i think i failed our test). 130 struck and i went home already. papa brought me home that's why 230 pa lang andito na 'ko. i have been stuck infont of the pc since 3!
naka ym ko rin c dahlia! i super love her. she's really easy to talk to. i regret not having been with her when we were still in bene.
anyweiz, im still off for one busy yet productive evening! good night world. ♥ing life =D
February 01, 2005
6:20 PM
i didn't go to school today. i wasn't feeling okay. besides, i was supposed to only have pe and fil today. okay lang umabsent. hehe.
im infront of the pc almost the whole day already. been busy reformatting this blog of mine. i super love my creative piece of hardwork! haha. actually i was supposed to be done with this kanina pang noon... but this pc hung!! i got super hysterical!! oh well. that's why see... my eyes are all strained na.
im pondering on happiness right now... wala lang. all of us wants to be happy. the reasons why we want to be happy drive a big part in our lives. that was actually the point that really made me think, because i think some of my reasons are actually unnecessary.
2:40 PM
finally im back!! been out of touch for ages!!
right now, my back is already aching plus i can't put anything to write.
be back later. i swear. enjoy the new layout!=D
madz: haha hi!!
